Conan The Barbarian: He Never Existed

Conan The Barbarian is an iconic character approaching the age of a century, because he’s whatever writers want him to be. Since Robert E. Howard, Conan sharing traits with epic characters opens up some discussions about him. The kind that beg to question on even in his own fictional world, the nature of his existence.

Hither Describes Conan

Conan The Barbarian by Robert E. Howard
Why’d it have to be snakes?

Conan The Barbarian was created by Robert E. Howard, a pulp fiction writer of the era’s apex. While many people consider Conan to be the ultimate alpha male, Howard’s creations epitomize his conflict with civilization. Much of Howard’s life revolves around moving from place to place in reaction to oil booms. The ever-reading Howard hated the oil booms, and everyone involved in it are people at their worst. Despite everybody working together, people’s greed to the point of crime and backstabbing made it hard to thrive. Even as Howard got older and hops around different jobs, he deals with various frustrations like exhaustion and low pay rates. His only escape would be the pulp magazines, to the point of inspiring him to become a writer.

Conan is the final product of Howard’s foray into a sub-genre he popularizes, Sword-and-Sorcery. Within the pages of Conan The Barbarian, Howard instills his experiences with civilization. Conan is many things: a wanderer, a thief, and even a king. Everything that goes into the character and Hyborean Age setting combines history, fantasy, and epics both ancient and contemporary. Which brings us to the topic.

Conan The Barbarian Is An Epic Fantasy

Within the many depictions of Conan The Barbarian, an implicit/explicit chronicler tells the tale of the Cimmerian. Given the fact that many of Conan’s adventures take place in the chronicler(s)’ past, it’s possible that things are open to interpretation. In Kurt Busiek’s take on Conan, the Chronicler is a translator of stories that he tells his prince. With how much can get lost in translation or even found, it’s possible some of these aren’t Conan’s adventures at all.

Kurt Busiek take
Looks good enough to me

For an analogue, the Epic of Gilgamesh tells the mythic quest of the titular Babylonian king. However, the epic doesn’t seem to be a coherent narrative, just a bunch of stories haphazardly put together. For example, one of the last chapters features Gligamesh’s companion Enkidu magically back from the dead. Either the tablet this is on goes back in time or this is history’s first fan-fic.

Then there’s the Bible’s story of the Virgin Birth; in respect to all Christians, this crucial part of the faith is actually a mistranslation. A Greek translator didn’t have a word to describe the Hebrew word in the Book of Isiah. It’s likely that the proper description is something like ‘Divine’ or ‘Pure’.

Kind Of Like Every Epic “Hero”

Of course what really compares to Conan are the heroes of myth like Hercules… sorry Heracles. Many Greek myths and epics are actually amalgamations of different characters, settings, and even storytellers. Heracles for example originates from Neolithic hunter cultures and stories of crossing into the underworld. Then there’s Conan, whose first story by Howard is actually a rewritten piece of his predecessor Kull. Now compare this analogy to how Heracles just happens to have the same origin as Perseus.

By the same token, the Chronicler as a whole is Conan’s Homer, a collection of different people under a purpose. Like if Conan might just be a mistranslation of Kull, does that mean Conan’s other adventures are different people?

Conan The Barbarian: The Jump-In Legend

Conan is something of an oddity in terms of the legends surrounding him. Constantly there is a prophecy about him becoming a King. In real time this is because Howard didn’t write Conan The Barbarian in chronological order. This little tidbit serves as an advertisement for King Conan’s The Phoenix On The Sword, while also giving Conan plenty of plot armor. Because how can Conan die from the dangerous situations he’s in if he becomes king in the future?

In a piece of an anthology, King-Size Conan, a supernatural enemy Conan encounters seems to be familiar with all aspects of Conan’s life. The living wooden ship describes itself like the wind and time, formless and appears on condition. For the epic that is Conan The Barbarian, this means that Conan’s life makes itself up as it goes. Unlike Tolkien’s Middle Earth which has an official canon, the legend of Conan is prone to change. Or more shockingly, Conan is a fictional character in his own world.

Which Conan Do You Follow?

Whether it’s the Barbarian, the Cimmerian, the Slayer, the Conqueror, the Adventurer or otherwise, they are all Conan. It doesn’t matter if it’s Howard or Busiek at the pen, because the legend practically tells itself. Conan stands among the epic figures of legend and myth because in essence, he’s a meme. Memes/ideas do not actually exist, but they are real in some bizarre ways. It all depends on the material, the audience, the storyteller, and how people interpret one or the other. Conan The Barbarian? More like The Necessitarian.

The ink’s not dry yet, so be open to interpretation. Thanks for coming and as always remember to look between the panels.